from tuesday feb. 26 2008

and i infuse myself with questions unanswered, 
confused and dampered,
dar like the night, only revealing the light,
i seek revenge on myself, something i lack in this hard attack
 when i laugh at my last breath, you come back to heal me,
not quite like a panic attack,
but its so foggy outside, like a nausiating circus right,
rewinding the tape, realizing im falling back,
mistrusting the maturity i lacked,
and for once i can say, your right when i was wrong,
head ashamed as your moral bonds
hold it high cause you deserve the world,
but it upchucks me to hear
you replaced me with stupid girls
you went to end back to beginning 
something we both learned lacked dignity
so were both crying with peg legs
and you look so skinny
unbalanced, misplaced
but your eyes reveal the world
you shout out inside yourself,
sometime i craved to feel,
willing to open my wounds,
and when you held me i cried,
deep emotions never lied,
as your grip tightened i got frightened
never felt love, but then your sight went in
and i see now that your gone, 
we were suppose to start a family,
but its just a messy lawn, i have been cleaning for weeks
hoping you would help me, but i dont ask for guidance
on things i f*cked with, somehow your here,
ringing sweet lost love in my ear,
as my eyes bleed pain, wanting to cover my eyes
from the harsh rain, the thunder scars me,
as the monsoon sedates me,
i tried to uncover us in history,
just another un-destined mystery.

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